Relax, Let Go and Be Grateful!
Posted by Michele
I can be wound pretty tight sometimes. I’ve always been a serious person. I think I was born serious. As I’ve matured, I’ve tried not to make a mountain out of a mole hill over every misstep or erroneous decision. I use to consider myself a “go with the flow” person, taking things in stride, dealing with the bumps in the road of life as I encounter them. Little did I know I was mistaken.
Since 2003, I’ve been a student of Gabrielle Roth’s 5Rhythms.™ Basically, there are 5 rhythms to life and living (Flow, Staccato, Chaos, Lyrical and Stillness in that order.) Each person has a rhythm that they’re most comfortable with and live their life through. The local 5Rhythms™ teacher is producing five weekend workshops. Each workshop focuses on one rhythm. The first workshop focused on the first rhythm, Flow. It was during this workshop that I learned the “truth” about myself.
I actually spent more time standing on the edge then in the Flow. I discovered: Being in the Flow frightens me because to be in the Flow requires that I relinquish control. I still have choices and can make my own decisions but I have no idea where the Flow may take me or what I might encounter as I journey along. It may take me to and through places that I would rather avoid. It may slow down and I might have to hang out in the same locale for awhile or I might drift for a spell. It might stir up some things and I may find myself having to tread water or head for shore. It might speed up and move me faster than I think I’m prepared for. When I do actually get into the Flow, I’m usually facing backwards. I can see where I’ve been and what I missed but I’m unable to see what’s coming up or where I’m heading.
By the workshop’s conclusion, I decided that I want to make a conscious effort to be more in the Flow, I will face forward so I can see where I am, where I am going and what lies ahead and I will trust that regardless of what I encounter I will have faith and know that it will work out. For me, there’s one fundamental element, to being in the Flow, that’s almost a requirement, and that is trusting that the Universe has my back and that everything will work out in my highest interest. I learned that being in the Flow isn’t about being a victim of circumstance. It takes willingness and courage to be responsible for what I experience and to let go of the desire to control situations and outcomes.
These past two weeks have given me quite a few opportunities to be in and go with the Flow. The first opportunity presented itself when I “forgot” to file my certification for unemployment. I’m not even going to offer any reasons why it happened other than to say I did it to myself. I panicked when after 7:00pm Friday I finally remembered. I quickly went online and tried to file but of course the system was shut down. I tried Saturday morning and I was informed that I would have to file on my designated day or Thursday or Friday. I thought, OMG what am I going to do? I have checks and automatic deductions that are going to be coming through and I don’t have enough money. I have difficulty asking for help but I needed help. I called a very dear, reliable friend and asked for help. Without hesitation she was there for me. Money was deposited into my account before noon. The crisis was averted yet I kept thinking about it. I allowed this incident to darken my mood and my day. Finally, the Voice spoke up.
Voice: Why are you brooding and beating yourself up over this? The crisis was averted. You were able to borrow the money and it’s been deposited into your account. You’re not going to be able to follow up until Monday. Why are you choosing to let this spoil your weekend? Maybe you need to relax, let it go, go with the Flow, and be grateful.
Doggone that Voice. It was right. I was focusing on the fact that I was lax in my responsibility. I wasn’t focusing on the fact that I had someone that had my back or that I’m getting unemployment checks. Things could be worse but they’re not. I began making statements and affirmations of gratitude. I was grateful for unemployment insurance, friends, family, the Voice, my car, my dog, my health, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera. My mood lifted and I began to smile. Instead of spending time on the what-if and why, I spent time being grateful. I went to the unemployment office late Monday afternoon. There was no line. I walked up to the counter and spoke with a gentleman. He informed me that I could file that Wednesday, Thursday or Friday. I was out of the office in 5 minutes. I was grateful for that.
The next opportunity presented itself two days later. On the way to my brother’s, I narrowly avoided being sideswiped. My heart was in my throat and my pulse was racing. My mind started doing the what-if dance. I know you know the what-if dance. It’s that pesky little habit we have where we go over and over the what-if of a situation as if we can change the past. I have a lot of what-ifs. This time, I consciously made the choice to be grateful and to focus on the blessings and not the what-if. I know that using my energy to focus on gratitude is better then focusing on what-if. I was grateful that I was able to avoid the car and that Tabasco and I were okay. I kept driving. It wasn’t until I got off the expressway that I decided to actually check on Tabasco. I looked at the back seat and I couldn’t see him anywhere. I instantaneously panicked wondering where he was and what happened to him. Horrible thoughts and images flooded my mind. He never barked or whimpered. Did he get hurt when I maneuvered out of the way? I found him on the floor behind the driver’s seat between the door and my purse. My purse is bigger than him so he had no way of moving and because he’s so small, he couldn’t climb back on the seat. I lifted him back onto the seat and I laughed all the way to my brother’s house. I was grateful that he was okay and that he hadn’t piddled or pooped out of fright.
I had additional challenges the remainder of the week. From having to pay a change fee for an airline ticket to a cell phone battery that would no longer recharge. I went with the Flow, taking the actions necessary to minimize the effects. I was grateful for the high limit on my credit card and the low balance. I was grateful for having an old cell phone that I could use until I can get a new one.
There’s a benefit to being relaxed, letting go, going with the Flow, and trusting. Everything does work out in your highest interest. That point was demonstrated when I checked my account balance today and saw that my unemployment check had been deposited. All is right in my world!